Guys, listen up. If you ever for a single fleeting instant thought Valentine’s Day was about couples, you’re wrong. Get used to it. Seriously, VD is about your woman lock, stock, and barrel. From beginning to end. Sun up to sundown. The sooner you internalize and accept this fact of life, the better. As far as your personal feelings regarding this made up holiday go, it simply doesn’t matter. Maybe you think it’s the lamest, most useless day of the year. The bottom line is that your woman likely doesn’t share your opinion.
There’s a line from an Alan Jackson song: “When momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” Get the drift? The point is that the sooner you quit fighting the need to do VD the right way, the happier you’ll be. We know guys who start dreading the thing the moment February rolls around. Rather than torture yourself, why not just bite the bullet and do what needs to be done? You might even like it.
It has come to our attention that some men are hopelessly inept when it comes to making her feel special on this hideous calendar date. A panicked stop at the convenience store for flowers and chocolate won’t to do you a whole lot of good. Like a shark sensing blood in the water, she’ll read you like a book, say “thanks” all the while fully intending to make you pay in terrible ways down the line. Somewhere. Sometime. You’ll pay.
While you might be planning the greatest surprise in the world for later that evening, don’t make the mistake of letting the morning slip by without doing something special to let her know you didn’t forget the big day. Take her breakfast in bed, give her a shoulder massage, whisper sweet nothings in her ear. The point to keep in mind is that she needs to see you consider it an all day event, not just something to toss off in the evening. Ultimately, it’s all about romance. Many couples could use a bit more of it in their lives. If you forget to mark VD, there is a 100% chance she will begin thinking the thrill is gone, and when the thrill is gone, who knows what might happen next?
Is everyone sitting down? Now don’t panic at what we’re about to say, but you need to do something creative. Something she can tell her friends at work: “Guess what my husband did for me?” We’re not suggesting you
must recreate the Venus de Milo in her image, and certainly aren’t the ones to downplay the value of chocolate and flowers, but you’re going to need to use that brain of yours for something besides a repository for sports statistics. If you’re looking for particulars, sorry. You know her better than we do. Think of something.
Too many dudes let VD sneak up on them. February 13th is waaaay too late to start planning something like this. For example, one of our staffers wanted to schedule a couples massage at the local rub shop. Smart cookie that he was, he called and made reservations a full month in advance, and still was barely able to snag the last two available times. This is what you’re competing against. Guys who think ahead! If you find it difficult to be creative on command, the sooner you start plotting for next year, the better. It is February 23, 2012, about ten days past Valentine’s Day. For all you dawdlers, now would be about the right time to start making plans for next year.
In the interest of convincing her the entire day was created specifically for her, don’t forget to send something to the office: flowers, singing telegram, anything to remind her that you’re thinking about her, once again, from sun up to sundown and beyond. See how simple it all really is?
A final point. Don’t think you have to drop big bucks on expensive reservations at a mediocre restaurant. A picnic on the living room floor with candles, music, and a bottle of wine will likely score you a bucket of brownie points. See? Doesn’t have to be expensive. Just thoughtful. You can be thoughtful, can’t you? Remember those little cards your mom used to make you hand out to all your classmates, even the kids who smelled funny? Here’s a little secret. Your lady would probably REALLY enjoy getting one of those from you. Decorate it! Spray it with your cologne! Scrawl a special message, then put it in an envelope on her plate!
The Swank Life Team
Flickr / timsackton