standard She Runs Hot, Except When She’s Cold

The Swank Life ShowIf you’ve been playing the scene long, you’ve probably run into the following scenario a time or two and wondered, “What the hell?” You meet a woman. The conversation flows, as does the wine, and she seems to be genuinely into you. Sincere smiles, touching your arm, all that crap. At the end of the evening, she gives you her number and, with a “come hither” look in her eye, says you should call sometime.

Being a man and hopelessly out of touch as to the subtleties and context of her statement, you foolishly decide to do what she asks. You call a few days later only to discover that this previously warm ball of energy has turned into a cold fish on the phone. We believe we’ve already said it but the first thought that springs to mind is, “What the hell?” You could spend the next few years in a monastery trying to figure out her mercurial moods or you could just keep reading and we’ll tell you what likely happened.

The first thing to remember is that a woman can change her mind for ANY reason and some of them might actually be legitimate. If you’ve had the misfortune to tap into a Super Moody Babe (SMB), her initial interest might have morphed into a belief that it is her God given right to treat the world like crap. Or maybe her latent fears of intimacy have surged to the surface. It really doesn’t matter which; there’s a simple game plan for either.

If she’s polite but disinterested, you might say something like, “Hey, no problem. I thought you might remember the great time we had and be in the mood for more but no strings attached. Have a good one.” You’re not bitter or spiteful. Just chalk this one up in the “not gonna happen” pile.

If she’s rude or an Ice Queen, that’s a different matter entirely. Don’t let it pass unnoticed. Dating coach Ross Jeffries suggests coming back with something like, “Wow, what a rude, cold way to pretend to be. Have a good day.” Then hang up. If she calls back with anything other than apologetic contrition, hang up and write her off.

Believe us, you don’t need that drama. Next time do a better job of screening in the initial conversation. Anyone can have a bad day but you don’t need a perpetually frozen bitch attached to your wallet.

The Swank Life Team

Flickr / TheAlieness  GiselaGiardino