With the picture all over the Internet, we knew we were going to have to address the issue sooner or later. As you can plainly see, everyone’s favorite vodka-and-tequila-swilling bear got so totally whacked recently he lost track of his pants. We’re pretty sure the root of the problem can be found between his paws. Particularly the two bottles clutched therein. While Jose Cuervo and Sky Vodka might be plenty sheik these days (though not nearly as sheik as Swank Vodka, of course), it does have the unfortunate side effect of causing pants to disappear.
Luckily for Swanky Bear, through all the turmoil, giggling, and party games, he managed to hang onto his t-shirt, which is really the most important wardrobe accessory anyway – at least until they come up with some matching cargo shorts perfect for the casual bear-about-town.
How about it, Jake? We’ll let Swanky Bear get the chant started: “Swank Life cargo shorts, Swank Life cargo sh –– (crash!!!).” Oops. Another sideways header out of the chair and onto the floor. How embarrassing. Tequila and second rate vodka everywhere, and there he lays, motionless and snoring. We can’t help but think this unfortunate scene never would have happened if he had stuck with Swank Life Vodka in the first place.
Or who knows – maybe it would have been even better.
The bottom line, however, is this. Have you seen Swanky Bear's pants?! Let us know.
The Jake Swank Team