standard Deconstruction of the Opening Line

SwankLife.comUnfortunately for the perpetually tongue-tied among us, opening lines are an unavoidable part of meeting a woman. If you happen to have devised a brilliant alternative, a way to leap directly into the midst of a wonderful conversation, without ever having to actually utter the first line, we’re all ears. Nothing?

Keep in mind that dragging her off by the hair went out with the neanderthals.

Sorry, bucko, but to turn yourself into the swanky kind of dude you desire to be, you’re going to have to master the opening line. Keep in mind, we’re not talking about a classless combination of words you might think is cute but elicits responses ranging from groans at the sheer cheesiness to outright revulsion. Let’s start with the basics. What should be your goals for an opening line? How about the following:

  • A nonthreatening conversation starter.
  • Something to stir curiosity or capture the imagination.
  • Springboard for additional conversational threads.

The first thing your opener must address is the reason for your approach, because you can bet that the question going through her mind is, “Why is this guy talking to me?” You’re going to have to address it to avoid appearing to be a complete fool. Secondly, she’ll be wondering, “How long do I have to talk to this guy? When will he leave?” This is the time constraint aspect of your opening line. Lastly, you must ask an open-ended question. Anything that allows her to respond with a “yes,” or “no,” will result in a short, fruitless interaction.

Let’s recap. Your opening line needs to explain why you’re there, how long you’re planning on staying, and be phrased in the form of an open-ended question. Got it? Here’s an example scenario:

You walk up to a group of girls: “Let me get your opinion on something. I’m trying to help my friend and I’d like to get a female opinion.” (in case you didn’t notice, this explains why you’re there)

Them: “What?’

You: “Okay, I’ve only got a minute. Do you follow the advice given to you by your horoscopes? I have a reason for asking. Let me just get your opinions then I’ll tell you why I’m asking.” (here’s the time constraint and open-ended question addressed)

Them: “Blah blah blah.”

Sometimes this all you need to get the conversational ball rolling. Painfully transparent? Maybe, but tactics like this have been known to get more a few relationships started. Remember, the point is simply to get the conversation going. That’s where you’re really going to shine. If it gets them talking and not shooting spitballs at you, count it as a success.

The Swank Life Team

Flickr / the_toe_stubber