No matter where you are, if you’re thinking about making an approach, do it fast or forget about it. In the seduction biz, we call this the 3 Second Rule and it goes something like this. If your feet are in motion in her direction or she is aware of your presence in the slightest, make a confident approach within three seconds or you might as well not make the effort at all because you’ve already crash-bombed the opportunity.
Lots of things can happen in your mind over the course of three seconds and most of them are not good. The Average Frustrated Chump’s approach should be automatic. He who hesitates is definitely lost in this scenario. When you’re waiting, second thoughts begin to creep in, a result of over thinking and the much dreaded stall occurs. Standing there staring at her without speaking doesn’t make you mysterious. It makes you weak, creepy and a likely candidate for a restraining order at some point.
And if she sees you stalling out with an approach that gets de-railed by someone else changing the subject, hesitancy, slouching, telling boring, pointless stories…you get the picture. Any or all of these actions create a Demonstration of Lower Value in your target’s mind. If you think creating a DLV about yourself is a good idea, we need to go back to square one.
A normal woman (and you’re not going willingly approach psychopaths, right?) will always choose a DHV (demonstration of higher value) over a DLV. Acting like a shy kid at the high school prom isn’t going to cut it in the real world of cutthroat dating. While you’re nilly willying around, caught somewhere between an actual approach and the overwhelming urge to detour to the bathroom, some Casanova is going to sweep in there and steal her attention, perhaps for good. There are harder things to do in this life than overcome a bad first impression but we can’t think of any right now.
Have you heard the term Joe Schmoe? If not, trust us. You don’t want to be one. Avoid that eventuality by always observing the 3 Second Rule. Stand. Walk. Talk. It’s as simple as that.
The Swank Life Team
Flickr / outofsocks