standard SL 44 – April Davis of the Cupid’s Cronies


Today’s episode has Jake Swank talking with April Davis, founder of Cupid’s Cronies about good social networking sites and what Cupid’s Cronies does for their clientele in matchmaking and in their dating coaches.

 

Key Takeaways
01:35 – Quality women tend to be attacted to confidence men, who knows: who he is, where he’s going and what he has to offer.
02:60 – It’s best if you put your best foot forward along with displaying yourself in an open and friendly way, especially with a smile to women.
03:57 – Observing the situation is the best way to break the ice with women.
05:05 – Quality women are offten involved in nonprofit or volunteering organizations, which are also great ways to meet quality people.
06:13 – meetup.com is a great site for social networking because in whatever hobbies you may like, they will have groups for those hobbies and meet-up events.
08:30 – Facebook is pretty popular for dating which probaly is because people feel that it is realer and safer than going on a actual matchmaker website.
09:29 – People need to be careful about what they put on their social profiles not only for potential dates, but also for potential employers.
11:48 – Cupid’s Cronies goal is to help clients find their matches and help others to navigate dating as their life coaches.
16:00 – The network part of Cupid’s Cronies is free to anybody, and the database contians singles that can get setup if Cupid’s Cronies thinks they make a good fit.
18:08 – cupidscronies.com for anyone interested in sighing up in our free network and for any good match for them, we’ll meet with them and set them up.

 

Mentioned in this episode
cupidscronies.com
nul.iamempowered.com
meetup.com
mapfornonprofits.org
www.facebook.com
www.match.com
unitedway.org
habitat.org

 

Tweetables
Think about how you’d want a guy to treat your sister, if she were dating, what kind of guy would you want her to date?

The number one thing women want, time and time again is a man who’s confident, outgoing, gregarious, and chivalrous.

Jake Swank:
Hey guys, welcome to the Swank Life Show, where we talk about dating, entertainment and lifestyle. This is your host Jake Swank, and we’ve got a great show for you today. Be sure to visit the website at www.swanklife.com. Take advantage of our blog, our special offers; we’ve got all kinds great stuff for you there, to enhance your lifestyle in many many ways. So www.swanklife.com, go check it out.
It’s my pleasure to welcome April Davis to the show. She is the founder Cupid’s Cronies and she is going to share some great tips on increasing and improving our social lives. April welcome, how are you?
April Davis:
Hi Jake, I’m doing just fine. Thanks for having me today.
Jake:
My pleasure and you’re coming to us from Minneapolis, I believe?
April:
That’s correct.
Jake:
Okay good. Share some of your best strategies and ideals for. First of all maybe let’s start this process in chronological order if we can. What should the mindset of guys be or even women too, but mostly we’re targeting the guy audience here. In terms of where they can meet the best quality women.
April:
The best quality and where? Well the thing of it is, if you to want attract the best quality women. You have to think about where is she going to be, first of all, and what is she going to be attracted to? Quality women are generally going to be very confident, they’re going to have well rounded background, and they are going to be places, like maybe the gym, or library, typically not the club late at night. So you want to put yourself in those kind of locations, they can be any where. People always say they think they need to go somewhere in particular to find women and really they’re at the grocery store, they’re at the, you know, you past them on the street, they’re everywhere. And the key is to be in the right, like you said, in the right mindset and also learn to project the kind of person that they are going to be attracted to. And what that is, is generally a guy with a lot of confidence and knows who he is, knows where he going, and knows what he has to offer.
Jake:
Okay good, so that’s drill down on that a little bit. Certainly good tips and I think that’s fairly common advice in terms of confidence, that’s an attractive quality for sure. How does that show up? What are the tips on developing and projecting that?
April:
Well, it’s funny cause I always, when I explain this to people I tell them to think of, everyone’s seen that video on discovery channel, where the bird is dancing around, trying to impress the woman and [Laughs] it’s our natural, it’s natural for us to be attracted to what is the most attractive person out there. So the number one thing is to make sure you’re putting your best foot forward and dressing, displaying yourself in a way that is going to naturally attract women. And also when you do meet them don’t be afraid to look them in the eyes, smile, and go up and talk to them. They’re not going to bite you, [Laughs] and if you don’t act like a creep, they’re generally going to be open and friendly to you as well. Especially if you greet them with a smile.
Jake:
Okay good, good. So any particular verbal repartee that you want to share?
April:
Well, [Laughs] the funny thing is, it’s just easy as going up to them and saying hey, hey my name is so and so on, and or maybe it’s just making a comment about the situation that you’re in, or something that’s around you, making an observation, if you’re at the grocery you could observe, if you’re in the meat section or something and there’s is big lobster, and you can make a comment about the lobster; and just so you can get close to them and break the ice so to speak. And then try to look for different ways to segue the conversation into something else, or look for hooks and something that she may say, or something that she may have in her cart, or whatever that is around you, to try keep the conversation flowing.
Jake:
Okay good, and in terms of meeting places any advice on social networking and when I say that I don’t necessarily mean Facebook, or Twitter, or online networking strategies, or Instagram whatever. I mean any type of social networking, working through one’s friends and associates, colleagues at work. And then also the online compound too
April:
Right, well you mention earlier about quality women, and when I think about a quality woman hangs at, it’s probably, she probably going to be involved in some kind of nonprofit or volunteering organizations and there are a lot of those organizations that attract women that I know, just in our owned, in my neighborhood it’s like the Urban League or just those different young professionals groups and that’s where you’re going to find people that generally educated, they’re caring individuals. They want to give back to their community, and they always have different events going on. So it’s an easy way to get out there, and be social in those kinds of networks especially if you are volunteering along side with them. So I think that’s a great way for people to get out there and meet the quality people that they maybe looking for.
Jake:
Yeah, churches and religious organizations are great like that too. Is there any website, I know that some people struggle with finding these in their community. And it doesn’t seem like there is sort of centralize clearing house website to find these types of groups. Do you have any advice on that?
April:
You know I am huge fan of meetup.com there are tons events on that website and whether you like to knit or climb mountains, or whatever it may be, there is a meet-up group for that. So you can meet people in whatever hobby that you prefer, right on that site as well as, if you just decide you want to do volunteering or just care about different, like if you to run or whatever it is that you’re into, there’s some meet-up out there, So you can join. And a lot of times they’re free, sometimes you may have to pay to actually go to the event. You can also see who else is going to be at those events, so you might see somebody that you think is attractive just by looking at their photo and you never know.
Jake:
Right and actually I’m looking at meetup as you’d talking to me and I notice that there is a group that does knitting while climbing mountains and running all at once, so. [Laughs]
April:
Wow! [Laughs] That must be a wowly.
Jake:
And leaping tall buildings in a single bound. [Laughs] Yeah, absolutely, okay good. So meetup anything else?
April:
Well, that’s my favorite for online groups, otherwise there’s just googling it, it’s all depends on what city you’re in. I know here in Minneapolis, there’s is group called Maps for Nonprofit and they have a ton of different volunteer organizations and there’s probably the United Way that’s everywhere. And I know that they have a young professionals group and they have a lot of different groups that there are. Habitat for Humanity is another one where you can interact along side with other people while building these homes and that’s is a great way to meet people as well.
Jake:
Yeah, and actually doing something engaging in an activity is a great ideal. So what about the online world, I mean we’re really talking about the offline world, of course using a website to find these events and so forth is one thing. But then there’s the purely online world, Facebook obviously a big one I think Facebook may well be the world biggest dating service [Laughs]
April:
[Laughs]
Jake:
[Laughs] You know even though it’s not call one and that’s maybe the sort of benefit to it. It’s not called one, so there’s stigma attached even though there’s really no stigma anymore to online dating; but there used to be.
April:
I know I have a girlfriend that met her husband through Facebook and it’s kind of, it’s funny cause kind of like meeting through your friend because you’d see if your friends an of friends and then you can see their photos, and it just seems for whatever reason safer because you know someone that knows that person. And safer than just throwing your profile on, like on Okay Cupid or something. So I think that part of the reason why it’s so popular and you really get to see about that person too through their online profile and it’s a real them, you know what they really posted on their sites it’s not just something that they spend time crafting and making as their profile on match.com or something you see what their candid remarks are on their profile as well as their photos that their friends post of them [Laughs] and everything too so it seems to be just more real, you know?
Jake:
Yeah, I agree any tips though? for using it?
April:
As far as using it, it’s kind of like your online profile, you have to be careful on what you put on there. I would [Laughs] stay away from posting a ton of photos with you and other women although it’s fine balance right? Let’s see you can some to show that, yeah you do have friends, you’re a social guy and you attract women natural. But you also don’t want to get put in the category of maybe, a womanizer or a douchebag, [Laughs] or whatever and so it’s people are, everyone not just potential dates are looking at it, potential employers or your current employer. And you have be careful with it, of course can’t stress that enough.
Jake:
Yeah, so how do you navigate that fine line? I know that’s a real real struggle for guys.
April:
Well I just like to tell people imagine your mom is reading it [Laughs] and if she see it, are you going to be embarrassed because your mom see something on there that you’ve posted? So it’s just-
Jake:
I’m actually not talking about embarrassing drinking photos or some negative memories. I’m talking about navigating the fine line between the concept of social ability and preselection and other women bring attracted to a guy. And of the womanizer side, which is the fine line that I think needs to be navigated when people are presenting public image and certainly in private obviously, but I’m just talking about the public image here.
April:
Well, think about how would you want a guy to treat your sister or your mother, if your mom or sister were out there dating. And so what kind of guy would you want for her to date? And think about what he’s doing to boast, and what kind of image he’s put forward. And I think that can be just easy reference point to know that, okay this is probably inappropriate or this is probably not the kind of person that I would want my sister hanging with.
Jake:
Okay.
April:
That’s how I would look at it.
Jake:
Yeah okay, that’s a good guiding question to ask oneself. Good tell us little bit about what you do, you have offices in several places and tell us about your company.
April:
Yes, Cupid’s Cronies is upscale matchmaking slash date coaching firm and we have offices in: Minneapolis, Denver, Chicago, Miami, and Phoenix, Arizona, as well. And the way we work is that we’ll sit down get to know our clients and understand who they are, and we kind of act like life coaches and date coaching of course, and to help them to navigate the dating scene, put their best foot forward. And sometimes I’ve taken my clients shopping, while we are out shopping at the mall I’ve help them learn how to talk to women and introduce themselves to women and just get out and meet someone and also get into the relationship and once they are in the relationship I’m also there as a guide to help them along the way as well.
Jake:
Okay, I’m curious how much does that stuff costs?
April:
It all depends the coaching starts at twenty-five hundred and as a client for a matchmaking side of things, it’s around ten-grand.
Jake:
So twenty-hundred and how’s the coaching work? What does that like weekly call or something?
April:
Well, we will meet with them at the beginning and do a in depth type interview and then we can put together a plan. Some people want to use online dating, some people just want to get better at talking to women and natural social environment. You know really depends and then we do have checkpoints twice a month with our clients and just do check in. And they also, everybody has their coaches cellphone number so that they are in situation or if they come across, or if they have a question of some sort they can always reach their coaches because you just never know what’s going to happen in between that time.
Jake:
I always thought that the matchmaking thing, there is obviously a lot of scamy people in that world. But that’s true of any area of the economy and business. It’s like how does anyone give a matchmaker ten-grand on faith. That seems like such unlikely thing that is actually going to work, you know?
April:
Yeah, is it unfortunate that matchmaking is a very private thing and there’s organizations that have taking it very public and corporate. But the that we approach it is so holistic and that’s why we can touch on the date coaching piece of it. Cause we want to, we can’t guarantee, nobody can guarantee that someone’s going to fall in love. But we can help people and coach people all we want to put their foot forward and we introduce them to people along the way. But we want to be able to give them the tools in order to make it successful. Because I can put people in front of each other all day long, but if they don’t know how to close the deal and make something happen then my efforts are in-vain so. I need to, I want to, it’s my goal, is to go to their wedding, and I want to help them as much as I can to make it a successful venture. So that’s why we touch on everything it’s not just putting them out on dates. It’s what are they doing on their online profile? what are they doing when they’re out meeting people at social events? How are they talking to these women? How’s the conversation going? And a lot of times you’re working on teaching people those conversation techniques. And there is the physical and then of course that deep inner confidence that we touch on at the beginning, building themselves up because I talked to so many women and that is the number one thing time and time again that they will said that what is attractive a guy that has confidence and that means he’s outgoing, he’s gregarious, he’s also the chivalrously all those things if the right guys do those things it’s doesn’t matter what he looks like [Laughs] honestly they can really get women because they’re a charming person.
Jake:
Yeah, but that’s really coaching function. I was asking about the matchmaking function and I’m sure you do coaches along with it, but for example how do you match people? Like where do you get both sides of that equation?
April:
Great, great, that’s the piece of our side of the company that is free, we offer, anyone can join our network for free and from that database that hold singles, we are able to choose people are that look, appear at to least to be a good fit for our clients and we meet with them and interview them and see if we still think that they’re still good fit for personally, and values, and physical of course, and everything like that. And then we’ll actually setup the date and we typically I think you have talk about to doing some sort of activity is really it’s just helps to make the conversation flow so much easier. And so when we setup the date we try to get people to do something and I’ve setup dates for people who go and shot archery, or go hiking, or you know, they could just going a walk with a cup of coffee as long as they are doing something next to each other versus facing each others and it feels like an interview. But it seems like we just have way better success.
Jake:
So you’re saying that you setup these. Are these individual dates or group activities?
April:
There are dates.
Jake:
Okay, but what I’m asking is where do you- You must meet with people all day long I’d assume, that is sort of hard for me to understand how you run a business like that. Because where do you get all of the women? I assume that the women are paying ten-grand or are they?
April:
Well anyone that’s to be a client they pay, but the people just want to be in our network that’s free for them to join and people will hear about us through word of mouth or they’re just search online and they might find our website and a lot of it is. We meet with people all day long, we’re constantly doing those, it’s basically a pre-day. When we meet with someone and see what they are like and what they’re about. It’s about networking and being able about, when we talk about, you probably heard people say, “oh, it’s a numbers game” It is and that’s why we do the work to narrowing down to a better quality [Laughs] number.
Jake:
Interesting, good stuff. Well give out your website April and tell people where they can find out more.
April:
It’s cupidscronies.com and anyone can go on there and join our free network and if we have somebody that is a potential match for them, we’ll meet with them and set them up.
Jake:
Good stuff, April Davis thanks for joining us.
April:
Thank you so much for having me.
Outro:
This show is produce by the Hartman Media company, all right reserved. For publication rights and media interviews, please visit www.hartmanmedia.com or email media@hartmanmedia.com. This show is for entertainment purposes only, and should not be considered personal or professional advice. Please consult an appropriate professional, if you require individualized advice. Opinions of guests are their own and the host is acting on behalf of the Hartman Media company company, exclusively.

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